Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Okay, seriously.

This has got to stop. I feel like your puppet because you're always manipulating my emotions. You either make me happy or you make me feel like shit. You're like another youknowho; I shouldn't put up with you and I shouldn't care. But I can't help but to care. You keep making all these promises - that you'll always be there for me, that you'd put everything aside just for me, that you'd put up with me through thick & thin. But you keep letting me down. You keep making these promises that you end up breaking. And then you find a way to come back. You make spontaneous phone calls that I pick up, knowing I shouldn't. But I do anyway, because my dumb ass is always hoping it would bring an end to all the make-me-feel-like-shits. Biggest SIKE of life or whaaat. I don't want anything to do with you and I want everything to do with you. I want to deck you in the face and I want you to give me a bear hug like you used to. I want to stop talking to you for once & for all and I want to stay up talking to you, even though we're both so damn tired.

What makes me even more mad is that I have no right to be mad. Haaaah. You're not my boyfriend; you don't have to do all that cute shit with me. So honestly, why the hell do I care ? Because I sure as hell don't have a crush on you. Not even a leeeeeedo, teeeeensy, tiny one. Or do I ? I guess I kind of do, because honestly, why else would I be hung over all of this ? You make me feel like an insignificant piece of shit; an option when I make you a priority. I can't say I'm "done", because we both know I'm not. I'm going to keep wanting to make this friendship work, with or without that little crush, because a friendship is probably the only relationship we'll have. But it's all good, because I honestly couldn't ask for anything better.

1 comment:

  1. ^_^ I'm glad I'm not the only one who uses blogger to release frustration about guys.

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